Owner Thomas P of the Western division leading Bock Boys didn’t panic when his team headed into the 4th quarter down 18 to the Abstract Machines.  After all, the Machines were out of ammo, and Thomas still had both his running backs left.  And when team leader Marion Barber scored 11, the game got even more interesting.  But the rally fell short, with Jamal Lewis scoring only 3, as the Boys fell to the Machines, 29 – 25.

The AM’s got the ball rolling early, with a team leading 10 from running back Ryan Grant, 9 more from backfield mate Thomas Jones, another 9 from receiver Dwayne Bowe, and 8 from kicker Jeff Reed.  But Mike F missed a golden opportunity to put a major beatdown on his division rival, when he left quarterback Matt Cassell’s 21 (as in 400 yards and 3 TD’s) points on the bench, instead getting only 3 from starting QB Chad Pennington.  Then again, Thomas wasn’t getting a lot of production from his Boys, either.  While kicker David Akers puched through 7 points, and receiver Greg Jennings added 6, no other Bock Boys starter managed more than 3.  The Boys won the defensive battle, with their Panthers defense taking 18 away from the Machines, while Mike’s Giants managed only 9 points against, but did add a DTD.  So it ultimately came down to needing 7 from Lewis to tie, and this week the nine year veteran just didn’t have enough game.

Thus endeth the Bock Boys five game winning streak, a heck of a run which saw them climb to the top of the heap in the West.  However, they still have (a tie for) the 2nd best record in the league, at 7-4, and with the Wicked Oil Profiteer$ stumbling again, the Boys retain their single game lead.  The Abstract Machines, having gone 3-1 over the last four weeks, are nearly up to mediocrity, and at 5-6 still have an outside shot at making the playoffs – if they can win out against the P.W.O.P. and Pimps.

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The Sims Stereco were officially eliminated from playoff contention Sunday when they dropped their 8th game of the season to the Anderson Brewmeisters by a score of 38 – 23.  Though running back Joe Addai scored a game-high 13 for the #2’s to keep them in the game early, he was offset by Andersons’ Peyton Manning, who posted 12 points to lead the hometown Brewmeisters.  With the Brewskies receiving woes continuing (in an apparent back door tribute to the visiting team, the AB’s three wideouts each posted scores of 2), Sims actually fielded the better offense, as Addai was ably supported by 8 points from Larry Fitzgerald, 6 from Drew Brees, and 6 from kicker Rob Bironas, while the Brewmeisters’ LaDanian Tomlinson’s 8 points gave the home team only two scorers posting more than 4 points.  However, Mark and Eric’s Cardinals defense posted a whopping 21 takeaway points, while Sims’ Jets D managed only a 2-against, along with a DTD.  This put the Brewskies ahead by 8 heading into the 4th quarter, where Sims’ tight end Kellen Winslow was left to duke it out with the Brewskies’ kicker, Ryan Lindell.  But while Lindell hit for 8 points, Winslow managed only 2, and the Stereco’s faint hopes of postseason play were officially dashed.

Winners of three of their last four and all alone in second place in the East, the 7-4 Brewmeisters become the second team to clinch a playoff berth.  However, they are in no way the powerhouse of yesteryear.  Rather, they seem to be somehow surviving in a season of injuries, underachievement, and managerial mistakes.  On the other end – in more than one respect – the 3-8 Stereco will hook up with the Pimps in a Week 12 game that will likely decide which goes to the Draft Bowl.

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The Irwin Hellions moved one step closer to the playoffs by doubling up the Colossal Waste of Time 35 – 16.  The C.W.O.T. was forced to play shorthanded when kicker John Carney failed to answer the bell; but, in an unusually generous display of good sportsmanship, Chris’ Hellions sacrificed receiver Reggie Brown to even things out.  Jody then proceeded to make the best of the situation, as quarterback Aaron Rodgers and RB Frank Gore led the team with a pair of 9’s, while receivers Calvin Johnson and Roddy White posted 6 and 5, respectively.  Meanwhile, the Hellions newfound rushing tandem of Kevin Smith and DeAngelo Williams continued to produce, with Williams’ 12 leading the home team, and Smith posting 7.  Things got tense on the Hellions bench when Donovan McNabb (2), #1 receiver Andre Johnson (3) and kicker Nate Kaeding (3) combined for only 8 points; but the Hellions’ Eagles D hammered the Time Wasters to the tune of 20 takeway points, while Jody’s Bears – typically a major team strength – failed miserably and gave away a point to Chris.  The 5 points scored in the 4th quarter by Hellions receiver Braylon Edwards merely added a little insult to the injury.

The Hellions, at 6-5 and on a two-game mini winning streak, have now caught Pirkle’s Wicked Oil Profiteer$ and moved into a share of 2nd place in the Western division.  They have now become playoff eligible, and remain in control of their postseason destiny – win out, and they’re in.  The Colossal Waste of Time, though in possession of the same 6-5 record, have backed into it courtesy of a two-game losing streak.  They now must face the division champion Naughty Figs and the Brewmeisters over the next two weeks.  It could come down to the last game before Jody’s clock winders find out whether their season was just a Colossal Waste of Time.

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For a time Sunday, it looked like Pirkle’s Wicked Oil Profiteer$ were having their way with the Naughty Figs.  That is, however, until you looked closer, and discovered the game was being played 8-on-4, with two Figgies not playing until Sunday night, and another two waiting for Monday nights exciting Buffalo vs. Cleveland contest.

The Oil Proviteer$ started things off well, with kicker Mason Crosby scoring 15 to lead all players, and RB Steve Slaton adding another 11.  Receiver Hines Ward put up a 6, and even though quarterback Phil Rivers threw away a point, the Oilmen quickly build an 11 point lead.  But looks were deceiving, as P.W.O.P. was out of ammo, and the Figs had basically tallied QB Jay Cutler (7), receiver Anquan Bolding (9), and the Steelers D (14 against plus a safety).  Even when kicker Nick Folk (2) and receiver Roy Williams (2) combined for only 4 points in the 3rd quarter, Brandon didn’t panic, because he had Marshawn Lynch and the home field advantage yet to take the field.  With the Figs down by 7 in the 4th quarter, Lynch came a gusher, posting a team-high 12 points which put the Figs safely over the top for their 10th win in 11 games, yet another team record.

Even though the latest Naughty win means nothing in the divisional standings, it does give Brandon’s team #1 seeding in the playoffs, meaning home field advantage in Championship Week.  Congratulations on another milestone for the team whose best previous regular season record was 8-5.

Seemingly paralleling the recent collapse in oil prices, the now not-so-Wicked Oil Profiteer$ have dropped three straight games, and four of their last five.  At 6-5, they’ve fallen into a tie for 3rd place in the Western division with the Hellions.  The team that was comfortably at the top of the heap at mid-season is now in danger of missing the playoffs.  P.W.O.P.’s next game, against the Abstract Machines on the road, could well determine who moves on to the postseason, and who stays home.

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In a game between the league’s two cellar-dwelling, 2-8 teams, the Piana Raze took another one in the ear, this time in the form of a 28 – 25, ho-hum loss to the Pimps.  Not exactly the most exciting game on the schedule, it did at least answer the question of which is the worst team in the league.

There should be something exciting to say about virtually any of the weekly matchups; but, when both participants are playing only to avoid the indignity of the Draft Bowl, and neither puts up much of a fight, it is difficult to find much to write about.  Brian, as usual and almost unavoidably, left rushing points on the bench.  Russ also left a few on the bench, and the game turned on the play of the Pimps new Dolphins D, which posted 17 takeaway points while Brian’s Vikings’ were good for only 4.  Raze RB Michael Turner had game honors with 10, Ben Rothlisberger managed to keep from throwing any pics (!) and posted a 6, the two kickers dueled to a 9 – 9 tie, and Pimps QB Kurt Warner threw for almost 400 yards and still managed to score only 7 points.

In fairness to Russ, it should be noted that the Pimps, who started out a miserable 0-6, have gone a respectable 3-2 since then, and a Week 12 win over the similarly 3-8 Sims Stereco could go a long way to keeping the Feathered Ones out of this year’s Draft Bowl.  Meanwhile, that burned smell is coming from the toaster the Raze have been in for the last five weeks.  There might be a way they can avoid a trip to the Draft Bowl, but it is making this writer’s head hurt to try to figure it out.  At least Brian can get on with his life and enjoy playing with baby Emily, who he probably should at least consider promoting to running backs coach for next sseason.

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