The final week of the regular season kicks off with what would be Draft Bowl XI were it staged this week instead of next. The 4-8 Naughty Figs and the 4-7-1 Pimps both started the season strong, going 3-2 and 3-1-1, respectively, out of the gate. Both have dropped like rocks since then, each winning only one of their past seven games. As a result, the Figs will miss the playoffs for the second straight year (and seventh time in eight years since joining the league), while the Pimps extend their own playoff drought to three seasons.

Injuries have played a big part of the 2007 breakdown for both teams. The Figs have been forced to sit the likes of Javon Walker, Travis Henry, LaMont Jordan, Anquan Boldin, and first-overall draft pick Marshawn Lynch at various times this season. The Pimps lost Jake Delhomme for the season and have been without possible rookie-of-the-year Adrian Peterson for the past several games. Moreover, their faces of the franchise – Shaun Alexander and the Bears defense – have had truly horrendous years, with Da Bears actually getting released.

While this battle of four-win teams is fit for a Draft Bowl, a rematch next week is unlikely. While the loser will host the big (small?) game next week, the winner could play themselves out of an opportunity to win rights to the first overall draft pick next year.

back to scoreboard

For the second straight year, the Sims Stereco and Anderson Brewmeisters will close out a regular season against one another. Last season, this matchup had playoff and division title ramifications when the 10-2 Brewmeisters slammed the 9-3 Stereco, 46-8. (Anderson kept the good times rolling in their Week 1 rematch this season, destroying Sims yet again, 49-0.) For this year's Week 13, however, both clubs are four losses worse than they were at this point last season, and Sims has already been eliminated from playoff contention. Anderson clinched their fourth consecutive playoff berth with a victory over the Figs last week, but they're destined to be a road team for the Wild Card round. A third straight victory over Sims will at least give them a shot at moving up from the No. 6 to the No. 5 seed (depending on the outcome of some Western games).

Despite starting a woeful 2-7-1, the Stereco have showed serious signs of life, posting back-to-back victories over eventual division champions Thomas and Jody. A third straight victory over yet another playoff team will keep Sims out of next week's Draft Bowl.

back to scoreboard

The final two Western Division games of the regular season have plenty of playoff ramifications tied to them, and the action all gets started at Purgatory Field, where the 5-7 Irwin Hellions host the 7-5 Piana Raze. Piana saw its three-game winning streak come to an end with a nail-biting 35-34 loss to Thomas last week, and the defending Super Bowl champs want to regain some momentum heading into the playoffs. A victory here will avenge Week 5's loss to Irwin, but – more importantly – it will also insure a home Wild Card game and possibly help them move up to the No. 3 seed (should the Machines lose to Pirk).

Irwin has suffered through a largely forgettable season, having started strong (3-2) before suffering a mid-season swoon. Yet the Hellions have rebounded to win two of their past three, including an inspired 47-23 road dismantling of the Machines last week. They are one more victory – and one all-important P.W.O.P. loss – away from returning to the postseason.

The last two times Irwin has hosted Piana at the Hellhole, there simply wasn't enough time to settle things on the field. The clubs tied 30-30 in Week 13 of 2005 and then again 47-47 in Week 1 of 2006. Yet another tie (as improbable as that seems) would be as damaging as a loss, and the holidays would once again start early for the Hellions.

back to scoreboard

Pirk's Wicked Oil Profiteer$ host the Abstract Machines in a game they may need to win in order to clinch a second-straight trip to the playoffs. P.W.O.P. is the hottest team in the league right now, having won three in a row to become playoff eligible, but a loss to the Machines coupled with an Irwin victory over Piana would put an end the Pirk's season. A victory, however, would catapult them into the hosting a Wild Card game next week, possibly against these very Machines.

The AMs limp into Oil Town having suffered their worst loss of the season, a 24-point beatdown by the resurgent Hellions. Suddenly, with two loses in four weeks, the Machines grip on the No. 3 seed is slipping; a loss this week to the Profiteer$ would concede second place in the West and possibly drop them to the No. 5 seed (should Piana beat Irwin). Can Captain Tom right the ship in time to regain momentum heading into Wild Card Week, or will Tony Romo and Company complete a four-game run to the postseason?

back to scoreboard

No, we're not in Arizona yet, but the Eastern Division Champion Jody's Colossal Waste of Time will be taking on the Western Division Champion Thomas' Bock Boys in the season's final interdivisional battle. (How's that for planning?) Unfortunately, there's absolutely nothing at stake in this game; Thomas and Jody are locked in as the Nos. 1 and 2 seeds, respectively. Rather, this is getting Game of The Week billing because it's historic: never before have the division champs of a season met in Week 13.

Jody clinched their fifth Eastern Division title two weeks ago, but they were trumped at home last week by the surprising Stereco, 60-53, and now face the possibility of finishing with a 7-6 record (Ladies and Gentlemen, your 2007 Eastern Division!). Of course, win or lose, the C.W.O.T. already find themselves a game away from making their fifth Super Bowl appearance, and they should not be taken lightly. Steven Jackson and Frank Gore have reappeared, and Carson Palmer is coming off his second-best performance of the season. Jody certainly has the weapons to make noise in the tourney.

The Bock Boys have had a tremendous season. Draft Bowl losers a year ago, the resurgence of Randy Moss and the Patriots defense – coupled with the emergence of Marion Barber and Greg Jennings – have led to a 7-1 divisional mark and a second Western Division title for the franchise. Last week's dramatic last-minute victory over Piana snapped a two-game skid and have them once again thinking Super Bowl.

The Western Division has dominated the interdivisional series this season. They already have a 16-8 lead, and none of the five Eastern clubs will finish with a winning interdivisional record. Can Jody help his division save some face heading into the playoffs?

back to scoreboard