Jody's Colossal Waste of Time visits The Pimps for an Eastern Division showdown to kick off Week 6. The C.W.O.T. are coming off lopsided home loss to the Abstract Machines, while The Pimps rallied for a home tie against the Sims Stereco, which was good enough to keep them in sole possession of first place in the division. Week 6 is a brutal bye week for the entire league, and Jody and The Pimps will each be without a playmaker. Jody will line up without Frank Gore in the backfield, and The Pimps will be without Jon Kitna, who can probably use a break after last week's minus-2 point effort. Jody will happily welcome back Carson Palmer and T.J. Houshmandzadeh following their own bye, however.

The Pimps' last victory over Jody came in Week 13 of last season, and it was their only divisional win of '06. In an impressive reversal of fortune, The Pimps have a 2-0-1 record in the East to start the '07 campaign. Jody has struggled to start its season, but they are perhaps relieved to be away from the Vortex: the C.W.O.T. are 2-0 on the road but a surprising 0-3 at home.

victims of the bye week:
Jody – QB Cutler, RB Gore, REC Gonzales, REC Holmes
Pimps – QB Kitna, REC Smith

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The Naughty Figs host the Anderson Brewmeisters in a battle of the only two Eastern teams to post victories in Week 5. Anderson handed Thomas its first loss of the season in Week 5, while the Figs shut down P.W.O.P. to improve to 3-2, one win shy of their regular season total from a year ago. Both teams are being hit hard by the bye this week. For Anderson, Peyton Manning makes his annual sit-out, along with brand new Brewskie Dallas Clark. The Figs will be without six players total, including starters Marshawn Lynch and Brandon Marshall. The Brewmeisters have dominated the series in the past four years, winning 8 of 9 meetings with the Figs. Extending that run would get the defending division champs back to .500 heading into Neutral Site Week.

victims of the bye week:
Anderson – QB Manning, REC Clark
Figs – RB Henry, RB Lynch, REC Evans, REC Marshall, REC Walker, DEF Pittsburgh

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The Sims Stereco take their winless record on the road to meet up Pirk's Wicked Oil Profiteer$ in a rematch of one of last year's Wild Card games. The Stereco won that game to advance to Championship Week, but Sims can't seem to buy a win this year. They let The Pimps off the hook last week by surrendering 8 points to a tight end on Monday Night and settling for a tie. Pirk was roughed up by the Figs in Week 5, thanks largely to a six-turnover game from its QB and a minus-6 point effort from its defense. Thankfully, that Denver defense will be sitting this one out on bye. The Stereco will be missing last week's team MVP, the unheralded Kenton Keith, who will be sitting out on his own bye. Pirk may need a win to stay close in the Western race, but Sims needs a win to stay in the playoff picture and get that ugly goose egg out of the win column.

victims of the bye week:
Sims – RB Addai, RB Keith
P.W.O.P. – REC Ward, DEF Denver

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Thomas' Bock Boys return from Saint Arnold Stadium with their first loss of the season and are eager to take out their frustrations on a division rival. Enter the Piana Raze, who have played their worst two games of the season in the past two weeks and will now be without four starters thanks to the bye week. Reggie Wayne, Roy Williams, Adam Vinatieri, and the Colts D will all be watching this one from the Bockyard Stadium sidelines. The Bock Boys are already a perfect 3-0 against the other Western teams, and one more win here would clearly anoint them as favorites to win the division. The defending Super Bowl champs, by contrast, are just looking to right the ship (and stay afloat) for a second-half run.

victims of the bye week:
Piana – REC Wayne, REC Williams, K Vinatieri, DEF Indianapolis
Thomas – REC Johnson

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The Week 6 Game of the Week comes to us from Purgatory Field, where the only two Western Division teams to win in Week 5 – the Abstract Machines and the Irwin Hellions – look to keep that momentum going heading into Neutral Site Week. Tom Brady and the Machines blitzed past Jody's Colossal Waste of Time at the Vortex last week, earning a bit of revenge for last season's Wild Card loss on the same field. The Hellions struggled past the Piana Raze at En Fuego Field to improve their record within the division to 2-1.

The 2007 Machines are primarily a two-headed monster: Tom Brady and the Ravens defense. Brady is the highest-scoring offensive players in the league (70 points), and has scored at least 12 points in all five of his games. The Ravens are not exactly the Ravens of old, but they've proved to be capable of dropping 15 on an opponent any give week. The bye week, however, is stripping the Machines of some of their other weapons, notably Willie Parker, Marvin Harrison, and Jeff Reed, and there's only so much Brady can do without any real support base.

The Hellions had a rough bye week of their own last week, but managed to upend the hapless Raze with Eli Manning at the helm and Chad Johnson on the bench. They'll have their full compliment of healthy players for this one, however, but an overall scoring boost wouldn't hurt.

victims of the bye week:
Machines – QB Roethlisberger, RB Parker, REC Harrison, REC Jackson, K Reed
Irwin – DEF San Francisco

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