The regular season's final week kicks off with Jody's Colossal Waste of Time hosting The Pimps in arguably the least significant game on the board in terms of postseason ramifications. The Pimps dropped a 14-13 heartbreaker to the Irwin Hellions last week, making them playoff ineligible for the second season in a row. Jody, meanwhile, pulled off a tremendous upset, outrunning the Anderson Brewmeisters to guarantee a winning season and to lock up the No. 4 postseason seed.

For the second straight season, The Pimps are sitting on 4-8 at the 12-game mark. Things haven't gone exactly as planned, particularly with offensive MVP Shaun Alexander missing a good chunk of the season and his backups (Corey Dillon and Fred Taylor) underperforming in his absence. While it has certainly tried at times, that stout Chicago defense can't win them all by itself. While lacking the defensive muscle of The Pimps, Jody certainly has more pop on offense; Carson Palmer, Frank Gore, and Steven Jackson each scored at least 12 points in last week's win over the Brewmen.They have been inconsistent at times, but if they can produce close to those numbers in the postseason, the C.W.O.T. may yet make some noise.

While this amounts to a tune-up game for Jody (their seeding will not change regardless of this outcome), The Pimps are certainly hoping to go out on a high note. Having already lost four straight to the C.W.O.T., another loss here would doom them to their first Draft Bowl appearance since the league's inaugural 1997 season. A win – and some help – should prevent that fate.

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The final interdivisional matchup of the regular season pits the Naughty Figs against Pirk's Wicked Oil Profiteer$ in Oil Town, USA. The East has long since wrapped up the 2006 Interdivisional Title (leading 16-8), and the Figs were eliminated from playoff contention last week, but Pirk still has a possible postseason slot to play for. Once considered a shoe-in for the playoffs at 4-3, the Profiteer$ have collapsed down the stretch, losing four of their past five games. They now need a win over the Figs and either a Hellion or a Machines loss to grant them their first trip to the playoffs in three years.

The Figs' playoff hopes came crashing down in a 69-34 Week 12 beatdown at the hands of the surprising Stereco. This will be the second consecutive season (and sixth of seven overall) that the Figs miss out on the postseason tournament. The 2006 club has been ravaged by injuries, with the majority of offensive starters having missed time. P.W.O.P. has been nicked up of late as well, but that can't alone explain the drop in production in the second half. If they're to reverse trend, they'll need Philip Rivers, Chris Chambers, and Warrick Dunn to regain some of that early-season swagger. If not, Pirk could find themselves on the outside looking in for the third season in a row.

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Thomas' Bock Boys visit the Abstract Machines in the first of two important Western Division showdowns for Week 13. Thomas has fallen on hard times, destined to miss the playoffs for the first time in the franchise's seven-year history. They've fallen so far, in fact, that Bockyard Stadium is being readied to host next week's Draft Bowl. The defending Super Bowl Champion Machines have also hit a slide in '06. Needing a sixth win to secure a playoff spot, they will be playing for their postseason lives against the Bock Boys, who already beat them earlier this season.

Thomas' season has been undone in part by his quarterback carousel. Daunte Culpepper and Drew Bledsoe each had their chance, but neither performed well enough to keep their job. For better or worse – and there's been plenty of both – Rex Grossman is the man left to steer the ship. The running game has never recovered from the loss of Priest Holmes, and the receiving corps is also in flux. They'll have a chance to play for the first pick in next year's draft, but Thomas can focus on the more immediate task at hand: earning a season sweep of the defending champs and knocking them out of the playoffs.

The Champs have been here before. Just last season, a Week 13 victory over Anderson catapulted them into the playoffs and on to their first Super Bowl victory. Marvin Harrison was a big reason for that late-season surge, but the veteran receiver has only 4 points over his past three starts, crippling the offense. Tom Brady, Willie Parker, and the rest will need to step up if they're to have any shot of defending their title into the playoffs.

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As with last year, the season-ending matchup between the Irwin Hellions and Piana Raze has playoff ramifications involved. Unlike last year, however, the two are not playing for the Western Division title – Piana wrapped that up with last week's win over Thomas and is locked in as the postseason No. 2 seed. The Hellions, meanwhile, have been living on the edge since Week 10, when they needed to win each of their final three games to qualify for the playoffs. They're now two-thirds of the way there, having beaten Thomas and The Pimps – two last-place teams – at Purgatory Field. Traveling to face their division arch-rival (and bona fide playoff team) will likely prove to be the toughest obstacle yet.

In spite of last week's win, Irwin is coming off it's worst effort of the season. The usually dangerous Hellions had just two starters score over 5 points and two others score nothing at all. Eli Manning, in for the injured Donovan McNabb, clearly was not a positive spark, scoring only 2 points himself. The Raze, conversely, have won two straight and secured the franchise its fourth division title. Larry Johnson and a potent receiving trio of Reggie Wayne, Terrell Owens, and Roy Williams are a big reason for the team's 2006 success.

In a rather amazing feat, these two clubs have tied in each of their past two meetings. A year ago, a 30-30 tie was good enough to give the division to Irwin, but a repeat of that (or of the season opening 47-47 draw) would shut the Hellions out of the postseason. Win and they pack their bags for the Vortex; lose or tie and they go home for good.

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The Sims Stereco visit the Anderson Brewmeisters in a winner-take-all battle for the Eastern Division title, No. 1 postseason seed, and subsequent first round bye. Anderson failed to clinch last week against the C.W.O.T., who stunned them here at home. Sims has quietly kept pace, and – having already defeated the Brewskies once this year – are in position to win their first-ever division title.

Sims has been the surprise story of the season. Missing out on the playoffs in each of the last three years, the Stereco have already set a franchise-high for regular season wins and are guaranteed their best postseason seeding ever. Drew Brees has become The Man, supplanting Mike Vick – who led Sims to a Super Bowl victory in 2002 – as the team quarterback and leader. Second-overall draft pick Joseph Addai is coming off a break-out, 23-point performance in last week's victory over the Figs and seems ready to become a full-time starter. Throw in Robbie Gould at kicker and the Jaguar defense, and Sims has arguably its best team ever.

Anderson threatened to run away with the Division title and possibly a Super Bowl following its 10-1 start. Peyton Manning and Brian Westbrook are having great years for the Brewmen, but it's LaDainian Tomlinson that's playing on a superhuman level, lifting his club to win after win after win. It took Jody's best effort on the year to narrowly clip the Brewmeisters last week, but that upset has put everything accomplished thus far by Anderson into limbo. A second consecutive loss would bump the Brew Krew from a once thought to be guaranteed Championship Week appearance at home.

Make no mistake, this is a special game and history will be made. These two clubs are a combined 19-5. A Stereco victory would – for the first time ever – create two 10-win teams in the same regular season. An Anderson victory, o the other hand, would create the league's first-ever 11-win team. These two might very well meet again in the postseason, but it wouldn't be before Super Bowl X. Enjoy this one, folks.

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