The defending champion Irwin Hellions rallied past the visiting Abstract Machines Monday night to score a victory despite having the second-worst overall team effort of the week.

The Machines started strong enough, with Tom Brady tossing for 12 points on Thursday night, but their first-round pick Matt Stover missed all three of his field goal attempts on Sunday night. Things went from bad to worse for the visitors as their formidable Ravens defense was neutralized completely, unable to take a single point away from the Hellions.

Irwin certainly wasn't without it's own problems. Super Bowl VIII MVP Domanick Davis was shut out, and Donovan McNabb could only muster 2 points on Monday night. The Hellions' first round draftee, receiver Brandon Lloyd, actually led the team with 6 points. In the end, Irwin's Falcons defense provided the difference, stripping 13 points from the Abstracts to secure the win.

back to scoreboard

The Naughty Figs used a familiar blueprint to improve their team in the offseason, and cashed in on that strategy to upset the Anderson Brewmeisters 19-15 at Saint Arnold Stadium. Last season, Anderson used their first round pick on the Patriots defense, who in turn helped the Brewmeisters win their first division title since 1998. The Figs grabbed the Buffalo Bills defense with their first round selection in last month's draft, and that unit ripped the Brewskies for 33 monster points in the win.

The Figs needed that effort, as three starters on offense scored 1 point or less. Deion Branch, traded from Anderson before the start of the season, led the Figs with 8 points, and Willis McGahee ran for another 7. Anderson had little trouble putting up superior offensive numbers, with Peyton Manning (11 points) and first round pick Steve Smith (10) each reaching double-digits. Three other starters had 6 points or better, but the Patriots defense could only counter with 7 points against, leaving the Brewskies on the losing end of the scoreboard. The win is huge for the Figs, who had lost five straight to Anderson coming in.

back to scoreboard

The Bockville faithful willed the home team to a 25-23 opening day win over the visiting Piana Raze, despite a horrific minus-4 point effort from Bock Boy quarterback Daunte Culpepper. Randy Moss, making his first start for the Purple and Gray, scored a team-high 10 points and Shayne Graham booted another 9, bringing Thomas back into the game.

The Raze fought back with a balance running attack, where Tiki Barber and first-overall draftee Julius Jones each posted 9 points. The three Raze receivers each scored only 3, however, and quarterback Trent Green could only muster 2. Thomas sealed the win as his first-round pick Cowboy defense secured a last-minute interception in their game en route to stripping 11 points away from Piana. The win is Thomas' first in their last four games dating back to last season, while Piana has now lost three straight.

back to scoreboard

The Pimps were crowned unofficial champs of the 2005 FLF Draft, and their 33-6 drubbing of Pirk's Wicked Oil Profiteer$ might cement that claim. Their three starters from the draft – Jimmy Smith, Jaguars defense, and kicker Jeff Reed – scored 13, 19, and 11 points, respectively. Corey Dillon provided another 11 for god measure.

P.W.O.P. got 10 points from halfback Rudi Johnson, but the receiving corps – sans Randy Moss – managed to post only a combined 8 points. Worse than that, Brett Favre actually cost his team two points as he made his first start ever out of the Hellions' Black and Red. The Profiteer$ new Eagle defense, however, played great, stripping 17 points in the losing effort. For the quick starting Pimps, the win is their fourth straight on the season's opening weekend.

back to scoreboard

Jody's C.W.O.T. wasted no time in putting the horrors of 2004 season behind them, pounding the visiting Sims Strereco 37-21 at The Vortex. Quarterback Marc Bulger, traded from Piana in the offseason, sliced up the Stereco secondary for 11 points, while draftee Jeff Wilkins put up an additional 13 and Deuce McAllister ran for 9 more.

The Stereco, by contrast, only had one offensive player post more than 6 points (Larry Fitzgerald with 11), and had two others post only 1. Their Cardinals defense bested Jody's Panther squad 16-9, but that could only make a dent in the margin-of-victory. The loss is Sims' sixth straight in the season opener.

back to scoreboard