Thomas' Bock Boys became the first defending Super Bowl Champion in three years to start their season with a win, outlasting Pirk's Wicked Oil Profiteer$ in an offensive shootout at Bockyard Stadium, 53-44.

P.W.O.P. jumped out to an early lead behind a league-best 20 point performance from its Tennessee defense. Randy Moss paced the offense with 8 points while three other starters scored 5 apiece, but the champs soon rallied. Daunte Culpepper went off with a game-high 21 points, and the halfback duo of Priest Holmes and Quentin Griffin combined for 32 more during an explosive Sunday night. Griffin, who fell to champs with the 10th overall pick in last month's draft, scored 15 on his own. Profiteer Ahman Green matched Griffin's 15 points on Monday Night, but the rally fell short.

The win for Thomas is the fifth straight over their Western Division rivals from Oil Town and serves notice to the rest of the league that the Bock Boys are ready for their title defense. The loss is particularly frustrating for the Profiteer$, who, for the second straight regular season meeting with Thomas, post the league's second-best performance but walk away without the win.

back to scoreboard

In what was easily the ugliest game of the week, Jody's Colossal Waste of Time doubled up the Piana Raze in an interdivisional battle of defending division champions. At the opposite end of the spectrum from the Thomas-P.W.O.P. affair, these two teams struggled in posting the two worst efforts of the week.

Marc Bulger made his first start for the Raze but managed only a team-high six points against his former club. Halfbacks Jamal Lewis and Kevan Barlow only scored 3 apiece while the entire receiving corps could only muster 3 more points in the losing effort. Aaron Brooks led Jody's skilled positions with a modest 6, and the C.W.O.T. backfield of Deuce McAllister and Chris Brown combined for only 7 more. Jody claimed a 10-5 defensive win in pulling away from the visitors. The game was costly for both clubs, as Piana lost Charlie Rogers for the season (again), and the C.W.O.T. lost wideout Steve Smith to a broken leg.

The win for Jody is its fourth straight over Piana and a remarkable 12th straight over a Western Division opponent in the regular season.

back to scoreboard

The Irwin Hellions roared past the Abstract Machines 53-35 at the Hellhole in the week's second Wild Card rematch from a year ago. While Irwin's running backs lost four fumbles, there turned out to be more than enough offense for the Machines to handle.

Hellions QB Donovan McNabb had arguable the best game of his career, throwing for four TDs and a game high 20 points. Sophomore halfback Domanick Davis rumbled for 10 points, and Chad Johnson brought in an additional 8. The Machines, surprisingly, had their best effort come from former Hellion Curtis Martin, who abused his previous teammates for 16 points. Quarterback Trent Green was off, though, managing only a single point in trying to match McNabb's total.

back to scoreboard

The Pimps continued to build from a strong finish to a disappointing 2003 season with a season-opening win over the division rival Anderson Brewmeisters, 46-41. In what is believed to be a league first, The Pimps started all five of their 2004 draft picks in the win.

The Brewmeisters jumped out front behind strong play from its usual suspects. Peyton Manning had a team-high 10 points, and LaDainian Tomlinson and Brian Westbrook had 9 and 8, respectively. Despite so many new faces, The Pimps were brought back into the game thanks to a pair of veterans. Shaun Alexander hit the Brewskies where it hurt, rumbling for a game-high 18 points while Isaac Bruce brought down an additional 9. Second-round pick Jake Delhomme sealed the win for The Pimps on Monday night, outlasting Anderson placekicker Ryan Longwell, 8-7.

back to scoreboard

For only the second time in franchise history, the Naughty Figs found a way to beat the Stereco, upending Sims 34-27 to close out Kickoff Weekend. despite recent dominance over the Figs, the Stereco could not avoid a fourth straight loss during a new season's opening week.

Offensively, both clubs played well. First-round pick Marshall Faulk showed flashes of seasons past with 8 points for the Stereco, and Terrell Owens clocked in with a game-high 12. Michael Vick, making his first start in over a year, was held to a modest 5 points and was doubled up by the Figs' Chad Pennington, who had 10. Halfback Clinton Portis (11) also reached double-digits for the home team. The game would ultimately be decided on defense, however, where the Figs' Bills squad bested Sims' Rams, 13-6.

back to scoreboard