There would be no joy in Bockville today, as the visiting Pimps torched the hometown Bock Boys 49-25 in front of a rowdy, sold-out crowd at Bockyard Stadium.

The Pimps laid down a balanced attack, with only one of their seven offensive starters scoring less than 7 points. Receiver Peerless Price continued his strong play with 9 points, and Emmitt Smith - starting in place of last week's hero, Shaun Alexander - had a great 8-point effort. Thomas managed to counter with the electrifying Priest Holmes, who stormed through the Pimps' defensive line for a game-high 18 points. Yet the remaining Bock Boys failed to muster much of anything; Brad Johnson, making his first start at QB for Thomas, struggled and was doubled up by The Pimps' Mark Brunell 8-4. With the game all but decided, the Eastern Division leaders' Packers defense stripped 15 points from the home team on Monday night to secure the rout.

The win lifts The Pimps to 4-0-1, the best record in the league. Almost more impressively, the win is their sixth straight on the road, dating back to last season. Thomas, meanwhile, suffers its second loss in three games and drops to 3-2.

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You certainly can't blame the Abstract Machines for trying. The mechanical ones went into hostile territory this week in search of their first win and put up the league's second best effort. Unfortunately for them, the Irwin Hellions managed to put up the league's best.

Corey Dillon finally broke out of the gate for the Machines, scoring a team-high 15 points as the visitors broke out to an early lead. Marvin Harrison turned in his normal 10-point effort, and kicker Morten Anderson continued his hot start with 11 to keep the Hellions at bay. Irwin, which was playing a man short after Troy Brown was again a game-time scratch, clawed its way back with the likes of Curtis Martin and his 10 points. The single biggest reason for the win, however, was once again the Tampa Bay defense. For the fourth straight week, Irwin's Bucs defense ravaged an opponent, this time besting the Machines' impressive Raider team 26-16. This effort pulled the Hellions to within 15 heading into Monday Night. And then Brett Favre got the ball. Favre torched the Machines for 16 back-breaking points, sending them to their second straight defeat and an overall record of 0-3-2. The Hellions, now winners of three in a row, move to 3-2 and hold the tiebreak over Thomas for control atop the West, a position they know well.

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Fresh off their 44-point drubbing at the hands of Anderson last week, Jody's Colossal Waste of Time gets back on the right track with a 35-30 road win over the Sims Stereco.

The Stereco came into this one having won two straight, and their offensive momentum didn't slow down here. Quarterback Drew Bledsoe carved up 9 points for the home team, and receiver Amani Toomer brought down 8 points as well. Former C.W.O.T. back Stephen Davis turned in his best effort of the season against his former team, posting a team-high 12 points. The C.W.O.T. offense fought to stay in the game, and ultimately that's what they did. Aaron Brooks, making his first start against his former Stereco teammates, struggled for his 7 points, but Deuce McAllister found lots of room to run and posted 13 points for the visitors. The game went south for the Stereco on defense, however, as Jody's Miami squad schooled Sims' Chargers team 18-4, giving the game to the pewter and black. The win elevates Jody to 4-1, just a half-game back of next week's opponent - The Pimps. The loss drops Sims back under .500 to a mark of 2-3.

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The Anderson Brewmeisters were looking into a trap game with the Figs following their emotional rout of the C.W.O.T. last week, and they fell right in. The Brewmeisters, after putting up the league's best showing last week, put up the league's worst in Week 5 and fell to the division rival Naughty Figs, 54-28. Peyton Manning, who missed out on all the fun of last week's rout, had a stellar game with 12 points, but LaDainian Tomlinson and Fred Taylor combined for only 5, or 28 points less than they did last week. One person who matched his Week 4 performance was the Figs' Rich Gannon, who posted his second straight 20-point effort. That showing opened the door for rookie Clinton Portis, who scampered for 9, and kicker Ryan Longwell, who booted an additional 11. The loss drops the Brewmeisters back to even steven at 2-2-1, while the Figs rise to 2-3 after claiming their first divisional win of the 2002 campaign.

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Having dropped their last two games, Pirk's Wicked Oil Profiteer$ rebounded with a good dose of the visiting Raze. Jeff Garcia was reintroduced to the P.W.O.P. starting lineup before silencing his critics with a game-high 11 points. Travis Henry pounded out 8 points of his own and three other Profiteer$ starters contributed 6. Piana ground game was non-existent again, but the receivers kept the game competitive. Marty Booker (10 points), Ed McCaffery (9), and free agent pick-up Donald Driver (8) kept the game exciting for the visitors. P.W.O.P. put the game away on defense, as their Saints team (formerly of the Raze) bested Piana's Patriot squad 13-5. The win pulls the Profiteer$ record up to 2-2-1, just a half game back of the Western Division leaders. Piana falls to 0-4-1 and maintains its grasp on the worst record in the league.

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